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After I did a favor for longtime friend, she tried to make a pass at my husband

I’m going through a rough patch with a longtime friend, Kate. To give some context, my husband and I lost our beloved dog recently, and we were both in a fragile state. Our friend Margaret came over with her dog to offer condolences, and my husband stayed at home while we went to the store. Meanwhile, Kate and her little sister, Lanie, showed up unannounced, and Kate’s carelessness caused Margaret’s dog to run away. My husband had a panic attack trying to find the dog, and it was a traumatic experience for all of us.

When we returned, Kate was too drunk to drive, so I called her partner to pick her up and took Lanie home. My husband retreated to our bedroom to calm down, and I asked Kate and Margaret to leave him alone. I left for about 20 minutes to drop off Lanie, and when I came back, my husband, Kate, and Margaret were in the living room. Kate was crying, and my husband and Margaret looked uncomfortable. I spent the next hour comforting Kate, who was distraught about our loss. At this point, I was annoyed because I needed a friend to comfort me, but instead, I had to console someone who caused chaos.

The next day, my husband revealed to me that Kate had made a pass at him while I was gone. Kate had tried to get him to cheat on me, and he had to physically push her away. Margaret confirmed his account of what happened. I texted Kate to confront her about her behavior, and she downplayed it, blaming it on being drunk. She said that I was overreacting and that I was ruining her marriage by asking her to tell her partner what happened.

I told Kate that I no longer wanted her in my life, and I didn’t trust her. I gave her an ultimatum to come clean to her partner, or I would tell him. Kate refused to take responsibility and made excuses for her behavior, claiming she was emotionally and verbally abused by her partner, and my husband made her feel like a human being. She wanted me to forgive her and be friends again, but I wasn’t interested in any of her half-hearted apologies.

Kate later called me a “terrible friend” and started spreading rumors about me to our mutual friends. It’s been an exhausting and frustrating experience, and I’m not sure how to move forward. To complicate matters, Kate’s niece is my godchild, so I want to find a way to be civil for her sake. However, I don’t know how I can ever trust Kate again, let alone be in the same room as her. It’s a difficult situation, and I’m not sure how to make it work.